It has not sunk in yet

Well, I have some bad news that will probably change this blog permanently, as it is changing my life the most dramatically since I appeared the day before FDR died, April 11, 1945.

I was diagnosed with some kind of a abdominal tumor monday night. It is there in the cat scan, so there is no doubt about its existence, but over the next week or so of tests I will find out about its malignancy or lack thereof, effect on other systems in my body, and options. It is 9 cm and in a terrible location and very serious. It might have even caused the terrible debilitating pain in my legs and other mischief over the last two years that has limited my ability to do physical or interactive jobs.

It confounded the doctors when I went in the last two weeks with pains in my body all over, like side pains and sort of non-specific body pains, including my chest area. but they were not heart-ailment-like chest pains, and my blood pressure was sky high. They thought it might have been an infection, but that did not turn out to be so. Indeed my EKG and other things showed they thought my heart was strong, I had high O2 saturation so my lungs and heart were not raising an alarm, my blood sugar and other tests were negative for diabetes, the disease that would most explain a lot of my adema, tingling, etc. but it just didn't seem to be that. My overweight condition has been an easy thing to blame for much of my problems, but it was going further now. Finally I kept complaining of the pains and they did a cat scan to see if there might have been some blockage or abdominal thing that didn't show in x-ray. They found it. With this as a backdrop, they agreed to prescribe some real pain medicine for me that is keeping me fairly straight for the time being. The state that the pain medicine returns me to is not a really normal nor a comfortable one, leaving me without good sleep and even during the day, I have to sit very still or shift to find a position that relieves the strange feelings.

Sorry to pass on this news this way, but somehow it helps me to put it out there. I will speak to everybody personally soon.